hmm, looking at my resolutions, i have accomplished absolutely nothing on that list and half the year is over already
yea, i bought a house (and it still scares me to think that i could lose my entire life savings in a blink of an eye), but i feel really fed up… i think i’m just tired of taking care of stuff, tired of being responsible, tired of being the older sibling, tired of playing second fiddle, tired of taking care of childish, self absorbed “adult-children”, tired of so many things… i just want to be taken care of for once… to have someone really out there looking out for me, someone fully invested in my future and i in theirs and not feel like i can be so easily left behind or ditched, someone who shares my passions and has their own to share
maybe it’s because i haven’t really been hanging out with a lot of guys lately that were similar to the guys from college – guys’ guys – but i don’t feel special and don’t feel a sense of purpose. aside from the haiti trip in november, i don’t feel like i’m doing anything either except churn because i have no free time and on the rare occasion that i get some time, i spend it catching up on stuff i need to do
yea #firstworldproblems, and yea, i’m being emo, and no, i’m not really finding much peace or rest in God right now.
i feel like being reckless and just leaving it alllllllll behind. time to move to taiwan?